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O Tannenbaum


Sometime back in the Nixon administration, I began writing my first fiction.  Although I had vague thoughts of publishing it, I had no idea what would be involved or that it would take me nearly forty years to accomplish it.  Writing is for those who have a very long view.

I began by writing short stories.  A few were published in my high school newspaper, but since I was the editor that probably doesn’t count.  Teachers encouraged me to get published for real, although they didn’t really know how either.  Living in a small town you can still dream big.  It’s just a bit more difficult to pull it off.

Danse Macabre is a great online magazine.  I submitted a macabre Christmas tale, “O Tannenbaum,” that won the 2009 prix d’écriture de Noël in Fiction.  The story was subsequently removed from the web when Danse Macabre changed servers, but it has a special place in my heart as the first piece someone other than myself considered worthy of publication.



Don’t get me wrong.  I generally have a dim view of my abilities, and it takes all the courage I can muster to submit a piece of writing for potential rejection.  For a total of six short stories published, I’ve had at least 35 rejections to date.  Each one cuts like Sweeney Todd on a bad day.  So “O Tannenbaum” is a bit of salve for a sliced soul.

The trick to writing is to trust your inner voice, not the predilections and idiosyncrasies of editors.  I wonder if it gets any easier, the longer you wield the editorial misericord?

Every word I write contains a piece of me.  “O Tannenbaum” isn’t my best work, but it was a story that packed a punch more potent than met the eye.  Danse Macabre went on to publish three more of my stories, but that is a tale for another time. 
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